Saturday, August 24, 2013

Bridal Culture...

Not only are my own nuptials approaching (Halloween 2014!), but I also work at a small improv theatre in Pike Place Market where we get our share of batchellorette parties.  Here are some things that I notice;

There is a notion that your wedding day will be the "best day of your life"

Being a batchellorette means this will be the last time to be wild and free, kick up your heels, flirt, and get drunk with girlfriends.

Being a batchellorette also means that you must dress as slutty at physically possible while barely staying out of the "streetwalker" look.  It also means you are as loud and raucous as possible.

Batchellorettes also must wear as much penis paraphernalia, references to being a "bridesmaid bitch", slut, etc.

What I would like to know is why are we teaching our daughters to behave this way?  Why do we re-enforce the idea that she should desire to be a slut before she gets married, but then refuse to be labeled as a slut thereafter?  What kind of backward notion is this?

I think weddings should be regarded as one of those amazing moments in life, those points in time where things are extra special, golden, magical.  Rites of passage.  Not regarded as that one last hurrah before you must shoulder the yoke of matrimony and be miserable the rest of your life moment.  If you aren't looking forward to life with your spouse, sharing life and the joys, pains, moments that it holds, you perhaps should rethink your reasons to get married.  I am getting married because I love my man.  He drives me crazy, he comforts me, he makes me laugh and makes me cry for all the right reasons.  I wouldn't trade it for anything.  When I get around to having my batchellorette party, I would rather go out for a fancy lady night (perhaps to a burlesque show) and enjoy the company than even mentioning to anyone that it is a batchellorette party.  I am more interested in having a joint party, because I don't really understand why we need to segregate ourselves, and I think it would be more fun anyhow.  But I digress.

I have very few doubts that the majority of brides-to-be that pass through my theatre are lovely women.  When you arrive (usually a couple of drinks in) with pink sparkle bobble penis headbands, teetering on impossibly tall heels, sporting blown-up condoms taped strategically over your breasts it is extremely difficult for me to think that you are an intelligent, caring, interesting woman.  All I see is a girl who is debasing herself in order to fit cultural norms, or someone who hasn't taken several minutes to question the reasoning of doing what is "traditional" for a batchellorette party in 2013.

What do you think? Do you find modern batchellorettes to be too wild or reasonable?  What was your batchellorette party like?  


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